We think Esther Baxter was very brave for truthfully admitting what happened in her broken relationship with rapper, Joe Budden. She opened up about how she lost her baby, after he allegedly physically abused her. Before you watch this interview she did with Bossip.com, you need to know how to escape an abusive relationship, whether you are pregnant or not. Many black women may remain in an abusive relationship and do not even know if they are pregnant. Many times, you do not know unless you have fainting spells, morning sicknesses and weird cravings. So, it is very wise for you to pay close attention to this article, which will give you guidance on how to leave a man whom maybe putting you or your baby's life at risk.
Many times, we as black women remain in an abusive relationship, because we are scared and have no place else to go. Our (step)fathers abused our mothers and we watched them remain in a marriage for many years, which sometimes ended in murder. This is the 21st century ladies and we must break the pattern we grew up around. We always hear from other black women, you don't have to defend yourself and or they rebuke us, if we express our anger against a man whom harm us with abusive words, push and shove us. Some black women endure it and such abuse have caused many of our sisters to turn against men, all together, because what they saw growing up. Some even were abused by their brothers whom were excused by their mothers for abusing them and it did not stop with their man. This hurts that black men and black women cannot yet seem to love each other whenever they choose to be together. However, there is a solution and all of you black women whom feel like you do not have any choice but to remain, because if you leave or defend yourself, you are called a 'butch lesbian' or falsely accused of being abusive yourself. It is time for you to stop believing you are not a real woman, if you defend yourself. We are not speaking of violence when it comes to defense, we are speaking of expressing yourself and even if it comes to blocking a man's fist from you and your child, then there is nothing wrong with it.
If you are knowingly carrying a child or even childless, you must make a decision to leave if there are any signs for potential physical abuse. You must ask God to give you a discerning spirit to read your man's spirit. Of course, you must be a child of God for this to occur. You must be able to sense what is going to happen ahead of time. Sometimes, it is natural not to know, but if you are a born again Christian, pray and ask God to speak to your soul. One of the ways you know when your boyfriend or husband has the potential to physically abuse you, is when you feel uncomfortable and he begins to be silent and won't say a word when you need him to listen. If you man has a cold heart, then he will not feel your pain when you are in tears and will crack jokes about your depression.
We paid close attention when Esther said they had an argument about Joe's communication on Twitter. No man, should get angry when you simply ask him about his tweets or requests that he does not seek out other women. Whenever a man gets violent when you are bothered by what he is doing, that's a clear sign to get out, right away.
So first you should have a close relationship with God, so he can guide you how you will leave your man.
Secondly, always remain calm when you have decided to leave your relationship. Ladies, when you feel you desire to walk away from an abusive man, there is no reason to argue with him anymore, because you realize you are about to be free. Just remain quiet and continue to think about ways to escape.
Thirdly, write a note to a neighbor to call 911, even if you just give them a hint by jotting down the word, 'abuse'. Go check the mail and slip a note under a door.
Fourth, fake it off as though you want to go window shopping to find something nice for the both of you, especially when he is asleep. That is the perfect time for you not only to call police, but to also leave.
Fifth, save up money in secret places. Maybe you should get a personal account and hide the account number in a place where he never looks, then when you are ready to leave him, you can use that money for another place to live or stay at a hotel room.
Sixth, one of the biggest mistakes some black women make when they are staying in a man's house is to rush and pack belongings, when in fact, there is not enough time. Sisters, leave your things there and when you go to the police, just tell them you would like to return for your possessions, if they arrested him. Many times, you may have to go through civil court to retrieve your belongings, but in other cases, police officers may stand by for you to get them, if they arrest him while you are there.
Seventh, call someone you know to pick you up from the police station or when you arrive at a safe place and tell them what is going on. You may need them for a witness in the future, in case you are harassed.
Now these tips may not be easy at first, but pray and ask God to guide you on how to escape your abusive relationship.
If you are afraid for your life and you do not know Jesus Christ as your personal Savior, we invite you to go straight to our Salvation page and totally surrender your life to Him. Be honest and ready to give up living a sinful life before accepting God in your life. Once you are prepared to make that wise step, then Jesus is ready to abide in you. Be safe and we are praying for you.
Bossip Exclusive Interview With Esther Baxter: “Joe Budden Killed Our Baby”By now many folks have heard Joe Budden’s song “No Ordinary Love Sh*t Pt. 3″ which details his turbulent...Read full article, here.
Source, Photo and Video: http://bossip.com