Thursday, October 27, 2011

Single Black Mothers Who Raised Their Sons While Being Disrespected By Their White Wives or Girlfriends

Note: This is a response we received from an anonymous reader who is a single black mother.   We want to let her know we realize it is not easy to love yourself as a black woman while being disrespect by your black son(s) who happens to be in an interracial marriage with a white woman who also disrespects you.   Please realize this fact, God love you and you are extremely beautiful because you raised your son all by yourself and he saw all the good you did for your son.  If he cannot appreciate the fact you were chosen to be his mother, that is his problem, but God chose you for a reason and the main reason no other woman could do a better job.   Yes, you raised your son all by yourself, carried him for 9 months, fed him when he was hungry, but now you must move on with your life and learn to love yourself without him, because if he wants to go along with the times of black men mistreating black women, because of his own self-hatred and insecurity, that's his problem.  So you must now read this article and realize it is a process of letting go of your son to love and appreciate yourself, but most of all, place God above him in your life.  Dear black sister, we hope this can be of some help to you and we love you and sympathize with your issue.

Now, to many people, there is nothing wrong in being in an interracial relationship; however, when it comes to being grateful for the black woman who was responsible for bringing her sons into the world, carried them for 9 months and then endured extreme painful labor, there is a demand for black men to respect their black mothers.  Respect from black men and younger boys to their black mothers has long been forgotten about among the black race who know so proudly diversify themselves among other races.   Many black women who join in on this revolution forget the pain of their sisters who are tired of putting up with disrespect from their sons who refuse to honor and respect them as their mothers.   Of course, there is a way to ignore black sons who send their black mothers a silent message that they think they are very ugly and we will deal with that issue and tell these black mothers how to rise above their sons devious cruelty, but we would like to first start off by saying you beautiful black mothers who are our sisters get our love, attention and respect.  For the black women who refuse to discuss this matter with you, because of their interracial marriages, they will eventually need us too.  Don't worry, because it never has been easy being a black woman, it does not matter if you are married to President George Bush.

When it comes to your son(s) disrespecting you by also allowing their white (Latino or Asian) wives or girlfriends to say all manner of evil against you, that is the best time to love yourself even more.   You must learn how to ignore ignorance and make a choice to live your life without your sons.   For many years, if the black men you raised and struggled to financially support without their fathers refuse to love, appreciate and respect you, then they do not need you in their lives.   It is time to dust your feet.  Fix up yourself the best you can and get ready for good man to come into your life, because many times you have to get your own sons out of your life and even absent in your mind before God sends you the right man.   Life is too beautiful for you to allow them to make you feel like you do not matter, you are a slave to them or even inferior.  Tell your sons goodbye and have a good life.  Why must you do this?  Because you are letting them know, you are placing yourself first in your own life as a queen God made you to be.   Now is the time for them to realize your cooked meals, sewn clothes and even massaging their grown crusty feet has to stop, all of that attention must now go into a man's life who needs you.  Your sons now have the woman they desire and it does not matter if she is pock-a-dot, if she is who he wants, let them go and live a happy life together, but refuse to allow either of them to mistreat you anymore.   Your silent message to your sons who have disrespected you in the presence of their white wives or girlfriends is simply this, "I am beautiful in the eyes of God and have completed my job.  Now, I am moving forward to spend time pampering a king God is sending into my life."   This message will indeed teach your sons how to respect black women in general, because if you do not leave him alone, then he will think it is okay to respect any black woman he may come in contact with for the rest of his life.  He will feel as though he is superior.   If you never fix him another plate of food, he will be left to only enjoy the food prepared by his white wife or girlfriend who thought she was above you.   


Single black mothers you have done the best you could to raise your black sons.   Offer to pray with he and his wife or girlfriend, but if it does not help, you must finally move on and give God time to work it out.  You must now let them go and live their lives.   God would rather you love them at a distance, instead of always having an argument about how they disrespect you.    Love God first, then yourself and make room for some fortunate man to appreciate you.  A lot of times, you have not been blessed with a good man, because you have not got rid of the same old problems in your life.   It is sort of like cleaning out trash.   Get rid of waste that is no longer worth it.   We are not saying your son is trash, but his evil ways are not worth your time.  First, make sure to tell him you love him and you will always be their if he needs emotional support, but now you must enjoy your life God gave you.  

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