Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Black Women Who Marry Outside of Their Race, But Not Accepted By Husband's Family

One question, before you married your husband who happens to be white, Latino or Asian, did you love and accept yourself as a black woman before you said, I do?   Did you follow your own mind or just followed what you saw many other black women were doing?  This is very important for you to think about, because a lot of black women today marry outside of their race, because they may feel black men are not attracted to them and so they feel as though they have to marry another race.   Did you seek God first and ask Him if it was His will for you to marry the man you are married to?   Or, did you just marry Him to get revenge against black men?   When you marry you must marry for all of the right reasons, because do not be surprised if you face prejudice from your husband's family if you decide to do so.    God must be included when we choose our spouses.  You have to make very sure, you married your husband because you love Him and He loves you and that your marriage was first, made in Heaven, meaning it was designed by God.   Therefore, my dear sister, you will never have any peace in your marriage and you marrying this man will not erase racial discrimination from your husband's marriage or his family.   There are many black men and women who complain about being called the "N" word by their spouses or in-laws when they got angry, but they remain married to their spouses and held onto to that miserable memory.

Believe it or not, there are many black women who feel too embarrassed to admit they made a mistake marrying a man they did not love, but only married him, because he was available and had money to give her a comfortable wealthy lifestyle.    One actual case was a black woman who faced racism and called radio talk show host, Dr. Laura.  This case hit national news.  She called into Dr. Laura's show complaining that her husband's friends were cracking racial jokes in her presence.   Dr. Laura did not support her and did not care.    So, dear sisters this reveals that in many cases black women end up feeling all alone and but may not have had to feel that way had she asked God  first.   Also, being around her husband's friends before they were married possibly for a year or more would have helped, that way she could have made sure if they were color blind or not.   Then, there have been several cases when black women married and had children, but felt left out as a black woman among her white in-laws and bi-racial children.   The truth hurts very bad, but we must deal with this issue, because black women who have admitted they have made a mistake do not know where to turn.    Souls of Black Women blog reveal if you are in that dilemma what should you do.

First and foremost, you should pray and repent to God for marrying a man you only married, because the masses of black women like Regina King told you to take who was available, instead of waiting on God asking Him what he felt about the man you married; it does not matter if he is black or white.   You still have to include God and ask Him about who you marry til death do you part, because years later, you will be miserable and it may seem like it is too late.    Next, ask yourself are you happy.   Is this the life you always wanted or did you marry this white man just because a lot of black men have chose other races of women to marry and turned the other way as though you were not pretty.   You need to be honest, because a lot of us black women are miserable for not being honest with themselves and when you lie to yourself, you will lie at the altar while exchanging wedding vows.   As you know it is a sin to lie, 'Thou shalt not lie (Exodus 20:16).'  That scripture is not just speaking about you lying on others, but also situations that include yourself.

Remember this actual case that involved a black woman named Sparkle who married an Indian man named Rajeeve Rai and when his father, Chiman Rai found out about it, he hired a hit man to kill her?   You have got to read this article about this Indian man who killed this black woman for marrying his son for yourself.   The father got a life term in prison, but this black woman who married Rai's son left her baby behind and the son went on with his life, true story.  Therefore, it's not worth all of that.  You cannot force other races to accept you.   This ole song, "please accept me, although I'm black" is getting too old now since the civil rights movement.   If other races will not accept or love black women by now, then you must make up in your mind to love yourself, because God loved and accepted you, first.   It does not matter who does not want us or will not accept us, all that matters is that God accepts us and if He is not enough, then we can never expect Him to bless us with a good and saved man.

Source and photo courtesy: wsbtv.com
Source: abcnews.go.com


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